There are no answers, only cross refernces. 
	-- Weiner's Law of Libraries
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If the course you wanted most has room for "n" students, you will be the "n+1" to apply. 
	-- Laws of Class Scheduling n1
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Class schedules are designed so that every student will waste maximum time between classes.
Corollary: When you are occasionally able to schedule two classes in a row, they will be held in classrooms at opposite ends of the campus. 
	-- Laws of Class Scheduling n2
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A prerequisite for a desired course will be offered only during the semester following the desired course. 
	-- Laws of Class Scheduling n3
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When reviewing your notes before an exam, the most important ones will be illegible. 
	-- Laws of Applied Terror n1
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The more studying you did for the exam, the less sure you are as to which answer they want 
	-- Laws of Applied Terror n2
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Eighty percent of the final exam will be based on the one lecture you missed about the one book you didn't read. 
	-- Laws of Applied Terror n3
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The night before the English history midterm, your Biology instructor will assign two hundred pages on planaria.
Corollary: Every instructor assumes that you have nothing else to do except study for that instructor's course. 
	-- Laws of Applied Terror n4
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If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book.
Corollary: If you are given a take home exam, you will forget where you live. 
	-- Laws of Applied Terror n5
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At the end of the semester you will recall having enrolled in a course at the beginning of the semester--and never attending. 
	-- Laws of Applied Terror n6
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Pocket calculator batteries that have lasted all semster will fail during the math final.
Corollary: If you bring extra batteries, they will be defective. 
	-- First Law of Final Exams
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In your toughest final, the most distractingly attractive student in class will sit next to you for the first time. 
	-- Second Law of Final Exams
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Anything in parentheses can be ignored. 
	-- Seeger's Law
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You never catch on until after the test. 
	-- Natalie' Law of Calculus
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The one course you must take to graduate will not be offered during you last semester. 
	-- Seit's Law of Higher Education
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The book or periodical most vital to the completion of your term paper will be missing from the library. 
Corollary: If it is available, the most important page will be torn out. 
	-- Murphy's Rule of the Term Paper
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The most valuable quotation will be the one for which you cannot determine the source.
Corollary: The source for an unattributed quotation will appear in the most hostile review of you work. 
	-- Duggan's Law of Scholarly Research
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The more general the title of a course, the less you will learn from it. 
	-- Rominger's Rules for Students n1
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The more specific a title is, the less you will be able to apply it later. 
	-- Rominger's Rules for Students n2
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The closest library doesn't have the material you need. 
	-- Hansen's Library Axiom
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No matter which book you need, it's on the bottom shelf. 
	-- London's Law of Libraries 
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When a student asks for a second time if you have read his book report, he did not read the book. 
	-- Rominger's Rules for Teachers n1
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If attendance is mandatory, a sheduled exam will produce increased absenteeism. If attendance is optional, an exam will produce persons you have never seen before.
	-- Rominger's Rules for Teachers n2
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